I’d recently uncovered a time capsule in my storage unit. A dusty shoebox containing the master copies of Lucille Brawl #1, a cut & paste comic created in May/June of 2006. Not knowing what I was doing at the time, I just started drawing my little cartoons with grey watercolors and pen nibs. It was glue stick versus packing tape, and I fumbled over layouts, texts, and dialog bubbles drawn with a ballpoint pen. Then I made the mistake of printing copies at Staples. So many details of the water-colored art were lost in washed out in photocopy toner.
What remains after all these years is an embarrassing and grimy as hell DIY comic book.
What’s more cringe is that for a while I would LARP/cosplay my own character out in the electric Chicago nightlife of the early aughts. Yikes.
There are a few copies currently for sale at Chicago Comics on Clark Street.
I had an amazing time at the ALA Convention as part of the Zine Pavilion. I want to thank everyone that stopped by my table and kept me busy slinging zines on Friday and Saturday. Met a lot of amazing people, so many complex minds to pick about literature and DIY culture. Plus I loved talking horror and sci-fi with the “real ones”.
This website has gotten a bit of an update. Now there’s a full section dedicated to zines and where to locate a copy for yourself. There’s also a new zine reading video uploaded to my YT page.
Well, hot damn. A horror/comedy short that I worked on, “won in the divorce,” and have been trying to huck out to indie film festivals for the last 10 years… is getting a screening at last!
Finally reaching an audience beyond a youtube link, Dating Axe will be part of a short film festival hosted by Sweet Void Cinema on Saturday, June 24th 5pm at their micro cinema located at 3036 W Chicago Ave, in Chicago, Illinois. The event is free with additional screenings on 7/7 & 7/8. Check them out and see what else they have lined up at: www.sweetvoidcinema.com
Dating Axe was filmed in and around my Humboldt Park apartment in 2013. With no budget and no script, it was slapped together by a skeleton crew running on nicotine and sleep deprivation. The completed film was h a t e d by the entire crew and forgotten on a thumb drive for a few years. There seems to be more story behind the film than to it. Perhaps one day I’ll write the history all out.
If you’re in Chicago and can attend, please throw popcorn and heckle Dating Axe as tribute to the director’s ego and bad no-budget films made by dorks everywhere.
You can watch this 6 & a half minute train wreck here:
I wrote a zine, and it’s not about horror movies, but it does have a lot of monsters. Ornery Cuss is a dark humored perzine with 11 short stories about mental illness, addiction, and grief.
Locally, it is available at Quimby’s Book Store & Chicago Comics. Soon, it’ll be available at Atomic Books in Baltimore, MD, and other distros across the U.S.
If you’re not in Chicago and can’t wait, Venmo $4 (+$1 s&h) to ‘weirdodujour’ and put your mailing address in the notes. I’ll even throw some little stickers in.
TW: drug and alcohol use, domestic violence, sexual assault, and death
2021 marked the 50th anniversary of Robert Fuest’s comedy horror film, The Abominable Dr. Phibes. Starring the legendary Vincent Price as a half-dead madman bent on retribution. The film is a decadent entry in early 70’s gothic horror with nostalgia for the roaring 20’s. Where elegance meets the preposterous, played straight. Cultivating a massive cult following for over 5 decades, the vibes of Phibes have left a dramatic influence on the horror genre.
Revenge is the Best Medicine
In an art deco ballroom stylized with shades of pink and lavender, a cloaked organist rises to the stage. Accompanied by a mechanical jazz band, The Clockwork Wizards, he is Dr. Anton Phibes. The famous concert musician, mechanically gifted and educated in theology. With the assistance of his robotic protégé, Vulnavia, he creates a masterpiece of revenge.
His noble wife, Victoria Regina Phibes, was taken too quickly and too cruelly from this world. Requiring immediate resection, a surgical team of 9 lead by Dr. Vesalius were too late to save her. Dr. Phibes rushed to her side only to arrive in a fiery car crash. He rises from the ashes disfigured and seeking justice for those that failed Victoria. A specter obsessed with aesthetic, Phibes smites each surgeon from existence with a biblical plague. The 10 curses of the pharaohs from the Book of Exodus are executed with precision. 9 killed Victoria and 9 shall die, 9 eternities in doom.
Our villain remains silent more than half an hour into the film before plugging himself into a modified gramophone. Addressing a photo of his departed wife, Phibes regularly grieves her passing by reciting poetry in his lair. A sort of shrine to her memory with images papering the walls. A false and unflinching face promises to join their two hearts together in time. The scene feels like a bizarre fever dream, watching Price pantomiming to his own voiceover dialog. Hammer Horror royalty, Caroline Munro, is uncredited as the beloved Victoria Regina. Her preserved remains lie in state, awaiting her husband to join her in the Elysian fields of the afterlife.
The Genesis of Phibes
Shortly after William Goldstein was widowed in 1961, he had a vivid dream about a man bringing his wife back to life. Developing his nocturnal idea into a 17-page story, he pitched it to Jim Whiton. A longtime friend of Goldstein, who had some success as a television writer. Sparking interest, the two men collaborated on a screenplay. American International Pictures loved Dr. Phibes but the script was drastically altered by story editor, Robert Blees, and director Robert Fuest. The more dramatic elements of the original were maintained by Goldstein, having authored the official novelization for Award Books
Following the success of the first Dr. Phibes film, AIP hastily commissioned Goldstein and Whiton to write a sequel, with a third planned. Their script stuck close to the original, following a similar story arc but was again overhauled by Blees and Fuest. Dr. Phibes Rises Again was released in 1972, lacking the humor and flair from the first movie. Price returns as the murderous doctor, traveling to Egypt in search of immortality. Accompanied by his mechanical assistant and Victoria’s remains encased in a calliope with The Clockwork Wizards.
Goldstein and Whiton had also written a third script for the planned franchise, but it never saw the light of day. Laurel Entertainment would propose two different Dr. Phibes films in the 80s and Price himself expressed interest in a treatment entitled The Seven Fates of Dr. Phibes by Paul Clemens. All would resurrect original characters but shape them into something more reformed. Various plot ideas surfaced of Phibes battling art thieves and occultist Nazis. The revenge of Dr. Vesalius’ son and an undead Victoria becoming something worse than her husband. Even a small screen revival was proposed with a tv series featuring Dr. Phibes fighting crime.
Though nothing materialized, the horror icon would live on through literature. Not only writing the official novelizations for both Dr. Phibes films, William Goldstein would also create a series of books. Authoring a prequel to the events of the first movie, Dr. Phibes: In The Beginning. Followed by Vulnavia’s Secret in 2013 and The Androbots in 2019. BlueWater Comics (now TidalWave Productions) introduced the characters to a new medium in their horror comic anthology series, Vincent Price Presents. Running 37 issues from 2008 to 2011, the stories featured retellings of Price’s films and original tales. Including new adventures of Dr. Anton Phibes dolling out his genius wrath. The collected stories were released in 2012 as a graphic novel, Vincent Price Presents: The Seven Lives of Dr. Phibes.
The Kind of Fiend That Wins
Most noted influence the Dr. Phibes films had on the horror genre is the Saw franchise. The fiend would construct intricate skill tests and speed traps for rivals to save loved ones in both movies. These deadly games were expanded on with the Jigsaw killer, giving way to 9 entries in the series. The biblical themed murders would add a different flavor to religious horror. Directly inspiring 1995’s Se7en, the themed murders were reimagined as the 7 deadly sins. Just as Phibes succumbs to his own work as the 10th plague of darkness, John Doe is consumed by his own as the sin of envy. Though revenge driven, these executions are part of a spiritual quest. The stark pageantry of the murder rituals looks like something out of a Jodorowsky film. Dr. Phibes expresses his passion with an altar of wax heads molded after the offending surgeons. Each bust is adorned with a Hebrew medallion and melted, a surreal act resembling scenes from The Holy Mountain. In an early scene, Phibes assembles his face with crude features and make-up to pass without detection as the living dead. This off-screen emphasis was also seen in 1990’s horror comedy, Nothing But Trouble. The 106-year-old Judge Alvin Valkenheiser is caught in a candid moment applying his face with similar repurposed prosthetics. Both lovable villains reside in mansions filled with automated engineering and hold multiple degrees of education. There have also been some comparisons between Dr. Phibes and Anthony Hopkins’ portrayal of Dr. Hannibal Lecter in Silence of the Lambs. Both sophisticated men that could be regarded as a Robin Hood among serial killers. A grim underdog that the audience roots for just like in Sam Raimi’s Darkman.
Love Means Never Having To Say You’re Ugly
The surreal elegance of the Dr. Phibes films has yet to be matched in the horror genre. Paying tribute to cabaret floor shows with musical interludes dripping with 70’s camp. This horror comedy is a very dry humor with minimalist dialog and bumbling detectives 3 steps behind the assailant. The Abominable Dr. Phibes is also a morbidly romantic movie. Climaxing with the mad organist embalming himself in a tomb shared with his wife. His madness born from a devoted love that transcends this mortal coil and death itself.
Musical Double Feature: Phantom of The Paradise and Shock Treatment
Whether adapted from stage or produced strictly for the big screen, musicals have been popular since the emergence of sound film technology. Choreography and music interwoven delight the imaginations of young and old alike, with lavish sets and perspectives that would be impractical in a theater. Adding in elements of kitsch and horror have given us classics like Little Shop of Horrors and Hedwig And The Angry Inch, yet one of the most common themes in musical film is a rags-to-riches tale. Set within the entertainment industry, characters of humble origins realize their dreams of making it big. Sensationalizing the notion that anybody could be discovered and revealing the grotesque addiction to reaching celetoid status.
Brian DePalma and Richard O’Brien would deliver darker takes on show business within the musical film genre. Inspired by German expressionism and classical gothic horror, Phantom of The Paradise and Shock Treatment are satirical journeys through the shadowy side of striving to become famous. De Palma’s rock opera would lament the loss of self and exploitative hallmarks of celebrity isolation. While O’Brien’s musical would be ahead of its time, predicting round-the-clock access to the rich and elite. Both films would achieve cult status in varying degrees and ask their audiences what would they give to be adored on stage?
Phantom of the Paradise
In 1969, a young Brian De Palma had overheard a popular Beatles song turned into unbearable elevator muzak. Igniting an intense disgust within the director to hear art transformed by corporate America for a quick buck. Combined with his personal demons of pitching ideas to indifferent studio suits, De Palma created Phantom of The Paradise. A Faustian musical, taking notes from Leroux’s The Phantom of The Operaand Wilde’s The Portrait of Dorian Grey.
The film begins with a grim introduction by Rod Serling of The Twilight Zone. Preparing the audience to meet the mysterious and Spector-esque record tycoon, Swan. Surrounded by 2-way mirrors and bodyguards, the genius producer seeks a unique sound to open his new music venue, The Paradise.
While hundreds of acts vie for his attention, Swan takes notice of the passionate and naive composer, Winslow Leach. Having written a cantata based on the German legend of Faust, Swan steals Winslow’s music and disposes of him. Brutalized and mangled in a record press accident, he is reborn as a masked Phantom. Terrorizing performers as they rehearse bastardized versions of his songs for opening night.
But Swan casts an irresistible lure, promising the cantata will be performed by the perfect songstress, Phoenix. Winslow is compelled to bind himself through infernal contracts signed in blood, when tempted with his heart’s last desire.
With Swan shrouded in surveillance and secrets, the cameras keep rolling. Tapes pile up in his vault, having recorded the darkest moments of Winslow and Phoenix. The Paradise’s mirrored walls shine distortions of dreams turned into obsession. Splitting from their innocence and integrity, leaving only empty reflections of fame. Winslow, now as the Phantom, rewrites his cantata as a confessional acceptance of his metamorphosis. Acknowledging his new founded villainy and the internal battle of angels and demons. Torn between the success of his masterpiece and saving the soul of Phoenix from Swan and the horrors of celebrity.
Shock Treatment
After a few unproduced ideas for a sequel to The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Richard O’Brien would release Shock Treatment in 1981. Considered an “equal” to the cult film without referencing the events of its campy predecessor. It features music adapted from previous scripts and shared themes withDr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and Poe’s short story William Wilson.
Brad and Janet Majors reside in the domestic doldrums of their hometown Denton, Texas. Now transformed into a Stepford suburbia of mindless entertainment addicts, the town is taken over by DTV. A television studio owned by fast-food tycoon, Farley Flavors. The Majors become guests on “Marriage Maze”, a game show that is quick to publicly humiliate them. To save their relationship, Brad is committed to “Denton Vale” for treatment. A psychiatric hospital that is also a reality show/soap opera.
But perceptions are warped through multiple camera angles and walls of television screens. The neuro-specialists are actually character actors and counseling is a series of commercials. Farley Flavors and DTV slowly seduce Janet with stardom. Brainwashed by pharmaceuticals and her own ego, she becomes a self-obsessed monster. Along for the ride is the entire town of Denton. Lost within its role of audience participation and Farley’s plot of take-out therapy and world domination.
Circling the series of events befalling The Majors is Betty Hapschatt and Judge Oliver Wright, hosts of “Denton Dossier”. An investigative show that gets canceled just as Janet’s star rises. Oliver and Betty suspect a conspiracy is taking place as others vanish within their on-air personalities. Fearing for Brad and Janet’s sanity they decide to intervene as fame and “mental hygiene” spreads like a virus through Denton.
“Are you one of those that finds this emotive form of presentation is overly manipulative?”
There is a rigid dichotomy between the mysticism of Phantom of The Paradise and the science of Shock Treatment. Yet both offer villains with good publicity that hook us with a litany of false pretenses. The only real power they have over us is what we give them when tempted with our dreams coming true. Both musicals expose the power of desire and how weak human morality can actually be. The soundtracks to DePalma’s and O’Brien’s musicals become allegorical representations of abandoning humanity for excess and fame. The track listing offers ballads of sacrifice and catchy commercial jingles foreshadowing the dirges to come.
What stands out most is the eerie prediction of reality television in all of its extremes. In the climactic scene of Phantom, Swan plans to marry Phoenix and assassinate her on live television. While in Shock Treatment, Farley Flavors is content to package and sell a fad fixation on mental health by exploiting the private lives of the audience to push products and ratings.
With tongue firmly planted in cheek, both films make use of mirrors and themes of character-splitting that beg the audience to look at themselves. Reflect on our indifference to commodifying the human experience and the rate at which we consume celebrity culture. To recognize our own faces in the screaming crowds at The Paradise or among the spectators of DTV Studios and consider the normalcy of unreality in the name of entertainment.
In the liminal space between holidays, we prepare to say goodbye to another year of unreality. 2022 draws to a close with the world population exceeding 8 billion and our Overshoot Day falling on July 28th, the earliest ever recorded. With major weather events, political misdeeds, and acts of mad science dominating news headlines, our day-to-day lives feel like a dystopian fever dream. The Orwellian issues of censorship and surveillance already permeate modern culture and AI art generators have us all questioning what it means to be human. The subtle renderings of reality have blended into a pulpy sci-fi fantasy.
Director Richard Fleischer, with the help of screenwriter Stanley R. Greenburg, envisioned the year 2022 a little more extreme in the film Soylent Green than we may have experienced it. Yet grappling with widespread poverty, inequality, and environmental degradation…it feels awfully damn close. The novel the film was loosely based on, Make Room! Make Room! uncomfortably fits that mold too.
So take a break from doom-scrolling your mass extinction memes and prepare for a gripping scenario of where current trends may be leading.
Make Room! Make Room!
The American illustrator turned sci-fi writer, Harry Harrison, is best known to the genre for the Stainless Steel Rat series. But it would be his 1966 novel Make Room! Make Room! that would delve into the consequences of overpopulation, exhausted resources, and corporate entities. Originally serialized in Impulse magazine, his novel inspired Dr. Paul R. Ehrlich’s bestselling nonfiction, The Population Bomb before becoming the basis for Soylent Green.
“This whole country is one big farm and one big appetite.”
Beginning in August of 1999, Make Room! Make Room! sees New York City at a population of 35 million. The United States is plagued with a collapsing water system, dust bowl, and food shortages. Over consumption of natural resources has left society in a housing crisis with many residing in run down cars. Requiring government assistance, citizens receive daily rations of food and water from guarded communal check points. Only the 1% get to enjoy simple pleasures, secured in fortified condos and penthouses. The narrative shifts among 3 people from various walks of life, struggling with the cards they’ve been dealt in the burned-out landscape.
“The Welfare ration cards took care of everything, everything that kept you alive and just alive enough to hate it.”
When a food shop in the marketplace has a flash sale on “soylent” (soy and lentil) steaks, a small riot breaks out among consumers. In the thick of the melee, an 18-year-old named Billy Chung loots a box of the soylent steaks to help his family survive. Later landing a messenger job at Western Union, his first delivery sends him to an affluent apartment block. Secured to the teeth, the luxury condos are lush with air conditioning and running water for showers. Captivated by the opulent lifestyle and the live-in girlfriend, Billy decides to return later that night. But while breaking into the apartment of “Big Mike” O’Brien, he’s caught red handed and accidentally kills him. Police officer, Andy Rusch, is assigned to O’Brien’s murder case and quickly falls for the girlfriend, Shirl. The two begin a relationship during the investigation and with nowhere else to go, she moves in with Andy and his roommate, Sol. A water crisis begins to unfold within the city, reducing rations, prompting more protests and riots. Andy begins working doubles as crowd control at communal pumps as well as facing pressure to solve Big Mike’s murder by judges and political figures. Shirl soon becomes disappointed with how little time the overworked Andy has for her.
Billy manages to evade authorities by taking up residence in a Navy scrapyard with a doomsday enthusiast. A former priest, Peter eagerly awaits the new millennium and the end of the world. After a few months, Billy believes it’s safe enough to visit his family but run afoul his pursuing detective. Cornered in his mother’s home, Andy accidentally kills the fugitive and the O’Brien case is closed. But by then the gangsters have lost interest in the murder and Andy’s superiors abjure his actions. Officer Rusch is then demoted about the same time that his girlfriend leaves him. Make Room! Make Room! concludes with Andy patrolling Times Square on New Year’s Eve, where he sees Shirl in passing among rich partygoers. As the clock strikes midnight, Andy encounters Peter, distraught over the aversion of Armageddon and time marching on.
“Can the world go on for another thousand years, like this? LIKE THIS?”
Soylent Green
In the early 70’s, MGM Studios purchased the film rights to the novel. Stanley R. Greenberg wrote the screenplay as a loose adaptation with Harrison as a consultant. Although the author was forbidden by contract to make changes in the script, he propagandized everyone on set during filming. Giving copies of the book to every actor and crew member.
With Richard Fleischer directing, Soylent Green was released in 1973. Starring veteran of dystopian action films, Charlton Heston, and Edward G. Robinson in his final film role. The ecological thriller imagines 2022 as a human-congested and polluted nightmare. Grainy aerial views of dense smog and burning ash from year-round heatwaves and mass extinction of flora and fauna. The severe depletion of natural resources has caused worldwide shortages of food, water, and housing. New York City’s population of 40 million keeps the poor in squalor. Hauling water from communal spigots and sustained by highly processed crackers provided by the Soylent Corporation. A food staple coming in flavors like red, yellow, and the most popular, green, which is manufactured from oceanic plankton.
Soylent Green follows Detective Thorn as he investigates the murder of William Simonson, a board member of the Soylent Corporation. During initial procedures, he loots Simonson’s apartment, bewitched by air conditioning and bars of soap. He even enjoys the services of the concubine who comes with the apartment. In one of the more memorable scenes, Thorn and his roommate Sol savor the food stuffs ransacked from the crime scene. A scraggly steak, an apple to the core, and a leaf of lettuce. This humbling meal was not originally in the script but ad-libbed by Heston and Robinson at the director’s request. An effective scene that sticks with you, of 2 friends enjoying real food.
Detective Thorn’s investigation leads him to a priest that Simonson had visited shortly before his murder. The visibly exhausted priest struggles to tend his flock with paper-thin faith caused by Simonson’s revelations. Due to the sanctity of the confessional, the priest can only hint to Thorn what Simonson had told him. Under orders from Governor Santini, Thorn’s superiors insist he end the investigation. But this is a Charlton Heston film, naturally he refuses and dangerously treads closer to the truth.
With books no longer published due to paper shortages, few could read outside of elderly archivists called “Books”. Thorn had swiped the title Soylent Oceanographic Survey Report 2015–2019 from Simonson’s apartment and gave it to Sol. Considered a “Book” himself, he takes the publication to a team at the Supreme Exchange. They conclude that the oceans are dying and can no longer produce the plankton from which Soylent Green is made. Confirming suspicions that Simonson’s murder was ordered by fellow Soylent board members to keep him silent. Disturbed by this knowledge, Sol decides to “return home” and seeks a euthanasia clinic (with the most immaculate customer service.) Thorn rushes to stop him but arrives too late and becomes aware of the awful truth. Moving to uncover proof of crimes against humanity, he is ambushed by Soylent operatives and finds refuge in the church where Simonson confessed. Wounded in battle, he urges his Lieutenant to spread the horrible truth while swallowed up by the despondent crowd.
“Soylent Green is made out of people. They’re making our food out of people. Next thing they’ll be breeding us like cattle for food. You’ve gotta tell them. You’ve gotta tell them!”
Art Predicting Life or Life Imitating Art?
While Harrison’s novel and Fleischer’s film differ greatly, themes from both cast dystopian shadows on the final week of 2022. Peter, the former priest in Make Room! Make Room! often droned on to Billy Chung about the end of the world. Believing that 1999 would bring on the Armageddon. By the end of the novel, he’s met with disappointment and anxiety as life carries on in the way it always had. Fears of a computer error apocalypse were rampant with the Y2K problem. While there were some isolated incidents of computer systems experiencing problems, these were largely minor and quickly resolved. Ultimately, the Y2K problem did not turn out to be as severe as many people had feared. Personally, being denied a grand ending to all things was a massive disappointment.
Soylent Green was one of the first mainstream films to bring climate change into public consciousness. Envisioning hazy cityscapes and grimy backdrops which aren’t that far out of the realm of possibility. Ever see a sunrise over the expressway on a still summer morning? In the film, Sol and the other “Books” at the Supreme Exchange uncover the truth about the oceans dying. In the real world, many calcifying life-forms, plankton, and other delicate ecosystems are in real danger from ocean acidification. Increasing levels of carbon dioxide are being absorbed by oceans and dissolving in the sea water as carbonic acid.Threatening the fundamental chemical balance of ocean and coastal waters from pole to pole.
In both novel and film, indoor plumbing was a thing of the past (unless you were rich). Andy Rusch often stands guard at communal water pumps while his roommate and girlfriend stand in line with jugs for their daily ration. Heston as Thorn, gapes in sweaty awe at a working bathroom sink. Even becoming emotional over the concept of a hot shower. Society has been watching one water crisis after another unfold over the last several years. 2022 saw Keystone, the “safest pipeline ever built”, have its third major spill in five years, contaminating waterways in Kansas. Jackson, Mississippi’s largest water treatment facility failed in August of this year, leaving 150,000 without drinking water. As of this month, about 45% of the United States are experiencing drought like conditions.
In spite of all the spiraling chaos in the background of Make Room! Make Room! the media only provides round the clock coverage of an Emergency Bill that would legalize birth control. Mandatory information and options provided for free, in a too-late attempt to get a grasp on population control. The character Sol serves as a mouthpiece for the author to air some opinions, arguing with Shirl who refers to it as, “The Baby-Killer Bill”. Both parroting outdated talking points that were more controversial in 1966. Harrison’s novel had been published one year after the Supreme Court’s ruling in Griswold v. Connecticut, which set the foundation for Roe v. Wade in 1973. Sol decides to join a march in protest of the overturning of the Emergency Bill and is severely injured in a resulting riot. Political events from this past summer parallel this turn in the book a little too well.
“We’re all winners in the ovarian derby, yet I never heard anyone crying about the sperm who were the losers in the race.”
Among the shiftless crowds standing in welfare lines in Soylent Green, many individuals (but definitely not all) are seen wearing hospital masks. A familiar sight in 2022 just about anywhere in the world. When Sol is injured in Make Room! Make Room! he’s denied proper care. Every hospital is overcapacity and there’s a shortage of antibiotics due to a flu epidemic. In our reality, Europe and North America are about to ring in the New Year with amoxicillin and other medication shortages. Meanwhile, hospitals in the United States are the fullest they’ve been since the pandemic began in 2020.
In Make Room! Make Room! a brown granular food supplement called Ener-G is rationed out to the public. The latest wonder of science that is processed from bricks of dried plankton. In Soylent Green, the titular corporation sold nutritional wafers in various color flavors like popsicles or Gatorade. I’m personally reminded of the Super Donuts from public school cafeterias. Made with vitamin fortified Nutri-Dough, they were slathered in frosting by lunch ladies to make them palatable.
“The world is experiencing a food revolution and the (FDA) is committed to supporting innovation in the food supply.”
FDA Commissioner Robert M. Califf
Driven by concerns of agricultural impact on the environment, in recent years, there has been a significant rise in the popularity of food alternatives. Plant-based companies like Beyond Meat and Impossible Foods have exploded across casual dining menus with a variety of products. Just this past November, the FDA approved of Upside Foods’ lab grown meat for human consumption. There’s also Soylent, a crowdfunded tech company selling meal replacements. The company name was specifically inspired by Harrison’s novel and the website even has a cute animation about how Soylent is plants—NOT PEOPLE! Though they released a limited-offer Soylent Green Bar online, describing the flavor as “unique and mysterious for the complex taste of humanity.” I tried a chocolate-mint drink, and its flavor profile was exactly what you expect; a pukey sweet chalk-shake.
Similar Flavors
For fans of science fiction food chains and dystopian diet fads, Agustina Bazterrica’s novel, Tender is the Flesh, portrays a society in which a virus has contaminated all animal meat and cannibalism is now legal. Marcos, a human meat supplier, is conflicted by this new society, and tortured by his own personal losses. In the Oddworld gaming series, the player’s character goes on a quest to defend the alien ecosystem from endangerment by industrial corporations. Specifically in the game,Abe’s Oddysee, the planet’s terrestrial race of Mudikons, is enslaved and processed into food products at Rupture Farms. Image Comics’ Chew, ran from 2009-16 following Tony Chu, an FDA detective with a unique palate. Set in a world where all poultry is outlawed following a bird flu pandemic, Chu and others like him investigate food related crimes. Breaking up egg cults, chicken speakeasies, and government conspiracies of space produce.
That’s the Way the Human Wafer Crumbles
Make Room! Make Room! and Soylent Green present the audience with a grim portrait of the inevitable, at the rate we’re going. The consequences of over mining natural resources and ruling corporate entities will catch up with us eventually. On the inside cover ofhis novel, Harry Harrison dedicates his book to his two children.
“For your sakes…I hope this proves to be a work of fiction.”
80’s horror writer, Andrew Neiderman, published his novel Pin in 1981. Described as a waspy gothic drama with incestuous undertones, the dark themes resonated with fans of fellow horror novelist, V.C. Andrews. Following her passing in 1986, Neiderman was the natural choice to become her ghost writer. The novel Pin was passed to a Canadian doctor suddenly turned horror director, Sandor Stern. Stern found Neiderman’s characters to be tragically alluring. Especially the story’s focal point, a medical office’s anatomical dummy. With the author consulting the good doctor, Stern would adapt the book for the big screen and direct Pin for New World Pictures.
A Plastic Nightmare
Brother and sister, Leon and Ursula, grow up in a life of luxury and emotional repression. Mother hovers over her children with a vacuum and dustpan. Strict and sterile, furniture covered in plastic and crisp white clothes. The wealthy Dr. Linden is their father, cold and buried in his work. In his private practice, he keeps a life-sized anatomical model. A visible man named “Pinocchio” or Pin for short. Using ventriloquism, Dr. Linden converses with Pin to entertain younger patients and educate his children. Leon and Ursula learn the facts of life as explained by Pin, with warmth and affection. The emotional qualities that Dr. Linden denies his own son and daughter. Pin becomes a parental surrogate, always thoughtful and knowing just the right thing to say. Offering gentle words of advice to comfort the friendless siblings. Ursula discovers Dr. Linden’s illusion early on, but her brother believes Pin is truly alive. Leon even begins sneaking into his father’s office to beg Pin for conversation. But the endearing fantasy becomes awkward and unnatural with age. Awakening a sinister gaze from the medical dummy’s plastic eyes. Pin suddenly seems to be everywhere and answering Leon’s requests for advice, even when Dr. Linden isn’t around. Meddling in relationships and putting ideas in Leon’s head. Unlike Pinocchio, Pin’s nose never grows because he never tells a lie. Everything he does is in the best interest of the Linden siblings. He is a member of the family, after all.
David Hewlett plays the often-guileless Leon as an adult. Hewlett is recognizable from other sci-fi thrillers like Splice, Cube, and Scanners II: The New Order. Cynthia Preston is the beautiful Ursula. Having previously starred in the 1999 television series Total Recall 2070 as Olivia Hume. Dr. Linden is played by Terry O’Quinn. Favorited to horror fans as the sinister Jerry Blake in The Stepfather and Stepfather II: Make Room For Daddy. Character actor, Jonathan Banks, lends his voice to Pin. Going from the gruff figure he’s best known as in Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul, to the calm and inanimate titular villain. Writer and director of the movie Pin, Sandor Stern, is best known as writer of the original screenplay for 1979’s The Amityville Horror. He had even adapted Duplicates, another Neiderman novel, as a made for tv sci-fi thriller.
By the time the movie Pin had finished shooting and editing, New World had dissolved their feature films division. The Roger Corman company had intended to release it as one of their last films but decided against it, last minute. Sandor Stern had to travel to San Francisco for a delayed post-production, where the first screening flopped at Century City. Not wanting to put any more money into it, New World released Pin direct-to-video in January of 1989.
As with all good films with rotten luck in distribution, the movie Pin slowly gained a cult following. In December of 1991, a print had found its way to the Manhattan Film Forum for a two-week run. Receiving excellent reviews, Pin was picked up for another two-week run in a San Francisco art house theater. Critics raved that Pin was severely overlooked when it comes to split personality horror films. Sharing the familial repression of Hitchcock’s Psycho and slasher thrills in 1978’s Magic. Themes of grief and identity loss can also be seen in the ventriloquist drama, The Great Gabbo.
“I have never lied to you or for you.”
In early 2011, Bloody Disgusting confirmed that Sandor Stern would be returning to direct a remake of the movie Pin. Andrew Neiderman had retained the original rights and together they set to rewrite a script closer to the novel. Updated and with more horror elements but no interest in a re-do manifested. Writer, Jack Reher, reached out to Neiderman and Stern begging to pen the first draft. Reher was a long-time fan of the movie and novel, claiming a re-imagining was his passion. Unfortunately for him, Stern and Neiderman hated it and told Reher to forget the whole thing. A few years later, producers were contacting the men about wanting to do this movie. Discovering that Jack Reher had been fanning a script around on social media without permissions or rights. In an interview with Flickering Myth, Reher assured fans that the remake would elevate the movie with Nicholas Bogner scheduled to direct. After a few cease-and-desist letters, Reher gave up on the remake and seems to have reinvented himself a few times since then.
Though largely overlooked as another early 90’s video slasher, the movie Pin remains a favorite. Highly regarded as a psychological horror gem, genuinely disturbing and twisted. The audience will find themselves sympathizing with every tortured character throughout their lives. Each scene is a puzzle piece that makes up a larger motion picture that will stick with you.
Shivering with sweat in a dark room, a man kneels on bare floorboards. Illuminated by candles, he works feverishly to solve the puzzle box in his hands. An ornate construction, made up of sliding panels and mysterious chambers. The air flexes with a distant tolling bell as polished pieces click into place. Out of it, a banal melody plays on a hidden mechanism. The din is reduced to a naked scream as the gates of hell open.
What is your pleasure, sir?
Clive Barker’s horror novella, The Hellbound Heart was first published in 1986. Dissatisfied with other film adaptations of his work, Barker made his directorial debut with Hellraiser in 1987. An almost verbatim adaptation of the novella. The film was the beginning of a multimedia franchise expanding on The Hellbound Heart. With each sequel peeling away more layers of Barker’s dark dreamscape. The doors of which are opened by a 3-inch cube called the “Lament Configuration”.
The box was originally called “the Lemarchand Configuration” in Barker’s novella. Known to most humans as only a rumor on the lips of a derelict. Several boxes were thought to exist but few were willing to track one down. Described as charts of the interface between the real and realer still. A box would break the surface of the trivial delights of human condition. The novella mentions one being locked away in the vaults of The Vatican. Another said to have been used by the Marquis De Sade while imprisoned in the Bastille.
All boxes were said to be created by a French craftsman, Philip LeMarchand. Previously famed for creating mechanical birds, he constructed a tool in the form of a toybox. A puzzle that to solve would mean to travel across the schism. LeMarchand’s background would develop later in Epic’s Hellraiser comic series that ran from 1989-1993 with the support of Barker. In them, LeMarchand was described as a mass murderer using human fat and bone in the construction of his boxes. The film Hellraiser IV: Bloodline would portray LeMarchand as an ingenious toymaker hired by an aristocratic occultist. The crafting of lament configuration would curse LeMarchand’s bloodline.
The existence of multiple boxes seems to have found its inspiration by way of the occult world. Some suggest it is reminiscent of the 13 Crystal Skulls mythology. Or more seriously, The Key of Solomon, a Renaissance grimoire of seals that command spirits. Barker once explained wanting access to hell in the book and movie. “Explored by something rather different than drawing a circle on the floor with magical symbols around it.” The idea of a puzzle came from childhood memories of his grandfather. A ship’s cook, having returned from a trip to the Far East with souvenirs. After one particular trip, Barker was given a carved wooden puzzle box.
In The Hellbound Heart, the Lemarchand Configuration was described as smooth, black lacquered faces with hidden pressure points. A surface reflecting faces of souls caught up in the obsession. Inside were the mirrored innards of fluted slots and oiled pegs. The cinematic version of the Lament Configuration was made of polished wood and brass. Special effects designer, Simon Sayce had studied ancient writings and symbolism from North Africa to China. He notes the inlaid characters of box’s brass work were inspired by surgical tools from an exhibit at the Pitt Rivers Museum. Later to be seen in the film as the disembodied torture devices summoned by the box.
The instructions to solving the Lament Configuration were part pragmatic and part metaphysical. The puzzle requires a cunning mind and nimble fingers. But to truly open it requires a dark desire for knowing. Desperate individuals seeking pleasure beyond mortal understanding. “You have to become aware of the Lament Configurations”, claims Doug Bradley. Longtime friend of Barker and actor that portrayed lead cenobite, Pinhead. “And then you have to find one, and then solve the puzzle. It’s not just the physical act of opening the box. It’s the motivation behind it.”
Barker’s Configuration has lent its inspiration to the modern urban legend/Creepypasta called The Devil’s Toybox. Part of a Halloween roadside attraction in rural Louisiana. It is described as a single room shack with 6 inward facing mirrors. The attraction’s challenge is to step inside for as long as possible without losing your mind. Another inspired object of the same name is used by paranormal investigators. These Devil’s Toy Boxes are much smaller mirrored contraptions. Popularized by Joshua P. Warren on Coast to Coast AM, it is believed to create an endless loop of energy. Some claim it attracts spirits and demons. Others utilize it to trap and remove negative entities.
The puzzle box remains an iconic artifact. Possessing an intricate mythology splashed across the pages of books, comics, and the big screen. Inspiring artwork, jewelry, toys, and a wide variety of other replicas. Many online merchants peddle puzzles that might offer access to paradise instead of hell. What kind of doors can you unlock with your own Lament Configuration? What is your pleasure?
